Heads Up....New Question at the OB/GYN

*Disclaimer: This post will remain on top purely for the sake of ANNOYING Kimberly Cardon. Scroll down to see any new posts (when I have time to write something).

Nurse: Do you smoke?
Me: No
Nurse: Allergic to any medications?
Me: No
Nurse: Any history of breast cancer?
Me: Nope
Nurse: Sexually active?
Me: My husband might disagree, but yes (hahahaha)
Nurse: With male or female?
Me: -------
Me: ummmmm, come again?
Nurse: (embarrassed) Sorry, I have to ask
Me: Well that's a new question on the old questionnaire!

Gotta love this world of equality for all! Why in the world would they need to know male or female?? I'm sure some radical complained that no one asked her sexual preference. Gotta proclaim it to the roof...(positive Christ-like thoughts, positive Christ-like thoughts)

Best Friend

Top 10 reasons why it sucks when yet another best friend moves out of your life.

1.Who else is going to nod their head and say "totally" when you use words like "you know the crotch burning at the start of your period??" (All male readers just left the blog)

2. Who else is going to instinctively call the second your about to chase your child w/some sort of weapon and ask if they can come get them?

3. Who else will still think your children are great and snuggle them, even though they know which ones have a highly infectious rash, which ones pick their noses and eat it hungrily, and the current carrier of a parasite?

4. Who else will squeal with delight when they see how good your "gluten window" is while making bread?

5. Who else will say a resounding "YES" when you ask if your butt looks big in a pair of jeans or if your bloated gut looks like your having another baby?

6. Who else will meticulously examine all the limbs and parts of your newborn infant the first time they hold them, and find that he has adducted thumbs and some fingers that don't straighten like they should?

7. Who else will clean your fridge AND your microwave AND bring you dinner when your having an "I'm such a loser who can't get anything done" day, even though her own laundry is piled to the ceiling and her fridge smells like something died in it?

8. Who else will happen to be pregnant the same time as you and insist on calling each other every night from the bathtub to complain about each others aching pelvises? (If any male readers didn't leave, now's the time to exit...)

9. Who else will insist you take a hit off of their anti-depressant when your having one of those really blue weeks?

10. Who else will I sit on the couch with, doing absolutely nothing for hours but watch our kids trash the house, and feel complete bliss?

Sure do love ya sista and it's been some great memories. You'd better make every effort to come back to me when Trevor gets his facility (or I just might have to check-in my Grandma or something).

And one more thing.....

I forgot to mention I'm grateful that the Primary Program is finally over! It turned out wonderful of course despite all the crazy practices. And thank heavens the stomach flu waited to make an appearance until the primary program was over. 6 hours after it was over to be exact. (Enter sarcastic voice here)

Katrina asked me what I wanted for Christmas today and I told her "Peace on Earth".

And I meant it....

Grateful for Lysol

Yup; The stomach flu has hit the Huhtala household in full force. Since Sunday afternoon I have been cleaning barf, butts, bowls, tubs, toilets, and done about 10 loads of laundry. The big kids are great...except for a few accidents they keep it in the bowls. The baby however...he starts to barf, and then he freaks out, and he starts crawling around, and tossing his head back and forth when you try to direct him into a bowl and there is just barf flyin everywhere! Poor baby :( He hasn't eaten in over 2 days and finally was able to hold down 3 crackers for dinner tonight. It's going to take me 2 months to get the weight back onto him.

Bella and I are the only ones who it hasn't hit yet. I count my blessings that Bella was not sick the same time as Tyson cuz she is just as "bowl challenged" as a 1 year old. Usually she doesn't bother to get up but rather just turns her head to the side and barfs all over her hair and bed.

I'm so grateful to be healthy and strong so that I can spend every waking hour cleaning contagious, infectious, intestinal viruses. Usually I get sick when all the kids are better and no longer nap for 4 hours out of exhaustion but rather can't sleep because of all their new found energy! And since my husband has stayed home sick to take care of his weak immune system, there will be too much work to make-up to stay home when I get sick! (Can you tell I'm in that cranky/sarcastic mood?!)

Truly, although I want someone to baby and take care of me for awhile, I in no way desire to visit the porcelain facility face first. I'm going to hope that my trusty iron-clad immune system holds true. (That comes from being raised in a family of 9 kids...just you try and introduce a new strain into this body! It's had em' all!)

Kudos to my mother who I remember at one time had I think 8 throwing up children and was sick herself....now THAT is something to complain about!

Warning: Not a gratitude post

No Bake Cookies SUCK! (Sorry for the profanities but see below)

I was CRAVING them today, and since I was sick and had sent Jay and the 3 oldest to stake conference...(Payback for my many sacrament meetings of complete horror while he sits smiling up on the stand.....muwaaahahaha), I decided to whip up a batch to feed my cravings. I wasn't feeling well and hence deserved to eat whatever sounded good. Stupid cookies....At the end of the day when I realized there were 2 left I asked Jay how many he had eaten:

Jay: Like 1 and a half
Me: How many did the kids eat? Besides Payton? (He hates PB due to his allergy as a baby and thinks it "burns")
Jay: Katrina had 3 total, Bella had 3 and Tyson had 2.
Me: (Doing the math in my head) Are you sure???
Jay: Yup
Me: (Hiding my head in shame) I am sooooo bad
Jay: How many did you eat?
Me: Are you sure you didn't eat more than 1.5?
Jay: Yup
Me: Positive??
Jay: How many....
Me: I believe approximately......11

Yes, that's right. 11 No Bake cookies. HEY! THEY HAVE OATMEAL IN THEM AND I CALCULATED THAT EACH COOKIE HAD 1 GRAM OF FIBER AND 1 GRAM OF PROTEIN EACH...AND THAT'S NOT INCLUDING WHAT I GOT FROM THE PEANUT BUTTER!!!

I have decided that No-Bake cookies need to be on my ban list. Anything that my family eats that little of and I eat that much of has no place in my home (or stomach). I've never felt so badly like I needed to go for a jog and if I wasn't completely certain that it would cause me to black out by the time I got to the corner due to my illness, I would wake up the dog and go right now. Probably all that sugar keeping me awake tonight. In my prayers tonight I had to ask forgiveness for being so glutenous...gluttenous? K, google confirms it's gluttonous. I didn't mean to say that I was a sticky plant protein. But if I was I'm SURE I would have more self-control!

Politics

I have never been involved much in politics. I know it's bad but most of the time I just mark the "republicans" and rarely research who or what I am voting for. This year it has been different. Since the church is actively campaigning to get Proposition 8 passed, I have been actively involved, studying facts, reading the issues and talking to people about it. You can read about why I support Prop. 8 here at my family blog.

I've been trying to be more informed. I've been trying to watch the debates, follow the news, and all I see is a few very good liars...I mean politicians...who twist the others words so that they look good and the other person looks bad. I know who I need to vote for but I am not very happy with my only choice. Just sort of choosing the lesser of two evils...or was it weevils? (Ha ha, Jay will get that won't you sweetie?)

I get so sick of the bickering and finger pointing at the running mates. Don't they get that this annoys the crap out of people? The tactic must be proven to work or else I can't imagine that they would all submit to it. I swear though, if just 1 politician would stick to the issues and not stoop to slandering his opponent he would have a lot of votes.

Food from scratch

I remember when the penny gumball machines disappeared from the local drugstore. I also remember when that drugstores ice cream was no longer sold for $.35/scoop. I remember when beef noticeably began to rise in cost due to the fad diets that promoted lots of red meat. However, I have never seen so many items rise in costs all at the same time as I have in this economic crisis. Maybe it's because I've always been a stickler about food costs. I'm the girl who reads the fine print, calculates the cost/oz. and never let's the supermarket pull one over my eyes with their "deals". So with my knowledge of what I pay for almost every item in my cart, it sickens me to see how much the cost of food is rising.

I'm grateful that before it turned bad, I had felt impressed to start learning to make a lot of things from scratch. From my bread, to my potstickers, I prefer to make the real deal instead of buying artificial nastiness. It doesn't save me a THAT much money since flour and fresh foods rises in costs with everything else, however, I feel good in knowing that I am feeding my family healthy, better for you food. It also feels good to know that I am making a stand against those companies that create "cancer in a box". K, there's no proof in that I just thought it had a cool ring to it.

I can't make everything from scratch, but I am resolved to keep trying. Lunchmeat is one I HATE, but have to have. Maybe I'll raise my own chickens and slaughter, pluck, and roast them for my kids sandwiches! Would you put it past me?